Skip to main content

It's for us!

Before I start here, I would like to say I am sorry, that I am not being racist here. No intention like that at all. So here I am sharing with you guys my two cents regarding my childhood and maybe you have had similar childhood experience too.

I admit that to be honest, I was raised by parents who would expect the best out of me behind their, “ I don’t mind” words. How do I know? I analyzed, observed and listened. With that, I understand what they wanted actually.

Most of my family ( I mean huge family including cousins, aunties and uncle) were placed in a chinese school even from preschool years. Our parents believed that the chinese school has the best education system that of all can offer. Most of my cousins and relatives were able to complete their chinese education until high school except for me. I am an exclusion, I couldn’t fit and survive even during my preschool years.

When I was in my psychiatry posting, I remembered that there was a young boy presented with delusion of granduer diagnosed with bipolar disorder (If I’m not mistaken of the diagnosis).He’s an Indian boy sent to a chinese school. The specialist told us that it’s more to the expectations of the parents that they end in a chinese school as they wanted their kids to be very bright like most of our chinese friends.

Somehow, I do agree with that statement too. It feels more like a fact rather than a statement. My family who went to chinese school are all high achiever. Thus, I believe my parents expected me to follow the same pathway. However, I could not perform similarly when I was placed in a similar environment. Weird right? Yeah, I am weird. After that, I was sent to a convent school where 95% of the students were chinese. I went to an international school for english class too as they really wanted me to speak and write like an english woman but I can’t hahaha. However, despite their intentions, I knew it was the best for my future. I did not blame them at all. They didn’t even push me to study very hard. I willingly wanted to study very hard. Because no one can force you to study very hard except for yourself, right? And of course, I enjoyed my childhood time a lot.

I have no kids yet but I am sure I will be a mother full of expectations too. I surely wants the best for my children. I even plan to put my children in a private school. That’s why I need to work hard for that. That’s one of my dreams and goals in life. If you ask me what’s my expectations for my children, I expect them to speak a fluent english,  to know how to swim, play music, excel in education and the list goes on. But what I will expect and wants the most was for them to be happy and comfortable with their life.

So I guess that’s how our parents think. They only want the best for us for ourselves in the future. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The littlest things in life.

Trust are not meant to be taken for granted.   It is from an event of life that a person limit their trust to his/her circle of human of choice. As for me, I may be nice to everyone but my trust is not easy to be gained. Please appreciate people when they trusted you. The most important trust that you can never take for granted is from your parents.  For me, I appreciate when my parents trusted me more than anyone else. Whatever stories that they heard from other people, they choose to listen to me first and I can never exchange that with anything. Feel blessed and grateful for not all of us are given that specialty. Respect your parents as they are the person that should earn that without attempt. When they give you the freedom, do not misused it. It was not easy for them. I guess you will one day understand when you are in their shoes. As a daughter, I know I am not that good but whenever I am deciding things or doing something, the  people that will appear firs...
Post a Comment
Read more

Learn to listen

I like how people talk about life to me. I like to appreciate every bits of words and adjectives they used to describe their life when talking to me. Things like how they describe their love towards their parents and family, how they overcome their problem, how they rise and fall in life really attract me. It was like reading a book but instead I just need to listen. Although sometimes I like to talk in between their speech but most of the time, believe me, I listen. When you really listen to what people tell you, you will get to learn a lesson from it. Part of me love to evaluate, (sometimes judge, I know it's bad but can't help. I am human.) process it and then learn the lesson. For someone that trusted me and I trusted them, I will TRY to advice though sometimes it doesn't really help. However, I know by lending my ears to listen to them, I help if not a lot just a little might do.  People make mistakes. I myself make a lot of mistakes in life. I myself am not th...
Post a Comment
Read more

It's not just us!

“Hello, amoi, you mau bikin baju ke?” I was welcome with that question. A few days ago, when I was given a few weeks off from classes, I decided to come back home to spent that little amount of time that I have with my family. On one of the days, I have some alone time to spent as my parents and brother were busy with their own schedule. I have got nothing in plan to do. Thus, I decided to go to China Town located in Kuching City. It was just 15 minutes away from my house. It was called China town as most of the shops there were occupied by the chinese sellers. (we do have our own India street anyway hehe) I have a reason of why I choose to go there. I have heard for quite sometimes that there is a chinese boutique that is famous for the hand-made kebaya. It has been operating for the past 40 years. It was owned by a chinese lady named Mui Mui. I guess she’s currently in her mid 70’s. She has made a kebaya that cost thousands ringgit malaysia. So I just went there to have ...
Post a Comment
Read more